Sunday, May 27, 2012

Conversation With My Mother

So, I talked to my mother today, just like always. We used to talk about happenings in my hometown and my life being their "gastador" and "laagan" daughter but since my Father's murder, I try to get her to talk about it and how she feels. She always tells me that my Father is funny, it's hard not to miss him. But that's just it, she never elaborated, until earlier.




It took her months before she's able to sleep in their room. Actually, until now, she still doesn't sleep there everyday. She said it's the hardest she'll have to go through.They have been together for 38 years and were never apart, they literally spent almost every second of their lives together.  They worked together (family business), ate most (if not all) of their meals together, and slept beside each other. And then just in a snap, the love of her life was taken away from her. She said it's beyond pain and until now, she's still can't let go of her fury. She's mad at the people who did this. She's mad at life. And then she asked me, "kanus-a pa kaha ko ani malipay nang no?"

And then tears just fell from my eyes. I cried not only because she's my mother and she's in pain, but most especially because she's a woman who misses the love of her life, the first and the last person she talks to everyday for years. It must be very hard for her, and we, her children, can't do anything about it.

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