It's Our First Anniversary!

Hello everyone! What's up? :0

This month, Briane and I celebrated our first year anniversary. People say, "time flies when you're having fun". It's true! I feel like we just laughed (and ate!) our way through our relationship. No kidding. I mean, we've had bad days, LQs, dramas, but at the end of it all, we just laughed (and then ate).

Briane is a natural comic and he said that one of his missions in life is to make me laugh. Exactly how you get a girl! ;) I, on the other hand.. Well, you know!



So, in between transferring to a new account, 2 jobless situations, and 2 hospitalizations, here we are, laughing (and eating!)

Anyway, I'd like to share with you pics from our anniv. I know.. "yawn", right? Well, it's a big deal for me because it's my first time to celebrate an anniversary with the person I'm in a relationship with.  The only other time was a long distance relationship, which really sucked then. Ok, so THAT, plus, you'll see that I am now bigger, rounder, fatter! Maybe, when you're happy you don't care about your figure anymore? NO. I am happy but I do still care about my figure AND health -- all the more now! It's just.. the party invites! Of course I can't say no - it's rude!

Ok, so here -- we had lunch at Tokyo Table. Food was really good except the sushis and sashimis and makis. Ironic that what's supposed to be their specialty isn't their best. I love jap food, and we chose to be there for that reason so it's kind of dissapointing for me. But all's well that ends well. The unlimited dessert! Oh...

who ate more??? ;)

we had to ask the waitress (who's very nice, btw), right?

Briane ate them all! I swear!

the resto. not a great pic quality - this is from a phone cam.

where's my wasabi???

ask me how many times did Briane go for another glass??? ASK ME! hehe..

i had to take a pic with the warrior

Briane's Miley Cyrus look! hahahahhahahaha

full and happier!

Then we headed to Mr. A, at Lower Busay to "chill". It's one of my favorite places in Cebu. The view's just awesome. Their coffee mixes and cakes are not bad as well. Well, too sweet for Briane's taste. We've been there a few times but for that night, we had beers and Crispy Pata. If you wanna go there, bring jackets as it gets cold at night.

we were their first guests!

and you have this for free

dating tip 1: put your phone down! haha

look what we did.....

look what HE did! hahahaha

I love the flavored beer (lemon). Briane went light - he has to drive

we couldn't grin more!

"The truth is sometimes things aren't exactly what you always imagined... they're even better!" One of my faves from the movie What A Girl Wants. I have always imagined what it's like to find someone you can really have fun with, and at the same time, you can really trust during the hard days.. and now, it's all happening.. and it's better! I am one very lucky woman!

Lastly, I want to share what Briane has to say..

Here's to forever! ♥♥♥

Thanks for reading you guys! And thank you for all your messages! And as you can see, I'm ok. And if I'm not, you'd know. I just don't have much time for blogging anymore. But this is hopefully a start.
xxx

L4, L5

A month ago, around the same time, same Monday morning, I woke up and a nightmare began. I couldn't get up. I felt extreme pain on my lower back. I pretty much have a high pain tolerance (I have tattoos) so by "extreme" I really meant EXTREME! My tears would just fell on their own. I was rushed to the hospital and stayed there for a week. I had to undergo rehab. Oh gosh.. I thought I was going to be on a wheelchair for the rest of my life. Worst, I thought I was going to die, and I didn't (and still don't) want to.

I had Herniated Disc (L4, L5). I admit, while my doctors were explaining their diagnosis, I wasn't listening. Yeah, I'm stupid that way. Tsk. All I cared about was if I can still walk. And yes, on the third day, I was up and walking again, though very slowly. I almost couldn't contain my happiness but I had to because my therapists (Hi Eula! Hi Chubs!) were there, I was shy. Yikes! Haha!

Here are my pics at the hospital:


I had to be hooked to this monstrosity for most of my stay at the hospital.



Maybe a little too early for the "in sickness and in health" part of our relationship but this might be a start - my uyab was with me through it all. Thanks Bri! I love you so much! ♥

Naturally, I was advised by my doctors to lose weight as my gaining has A LOT to do with the bulging of my disc. My therapists taught me proper body mechanics - I need to improve my posture. I now have to always sit erect. I can't do running for a while. I have to move "gracefully" which would be very difficult for I am way far from being graceful. Man.. In other words, I HAVE TO CHANGE MY LIFESTYLE!!!

And slowly, I am. For the past month, I already lost 5 lbs. It's a start!

I would like to take this opportunity to thank my doctors, nurses, and PTs at Chong Hua Hospital, my friends who texted/called/visited (special thanks to the ff: Therese Marie Cañete, Vanessa Rhea Labesig, Marie Grace Malanog, and my housemate Douey Joy Cagud - Girls, I OWE YOU.), my FAMILY, and my uyab, Briane. Lord, thank You. You truly are the most awesome!

There's a lot of articles about Herniated/Slipped Disc online. I recommend reading it here for those who don't know anything about it.

Guys, take care of yourselves. Health is indeed wealth!

Thanks to those who emailed me! I'M STILL ALIVE! May God bless you all! xxx

♥♥♥ LOVE DAY ♥♥♥

Belated Happy Valentine's!!!

In between being at the hospital for a week and rehab, I now have just been able to share pix from Valentine's day. Apologies. Actually, Brian wasn't here on that day as he had to go on a business trip. We saw each other the next day, the 15th (which is our 5th monthsary), at around 2 am. His flight's delayed and the waiting really sucked! Plus my right cheek got soooo big due to my swollen tooth. Talk about luck on love day! I looked funny actually. Ha-ha! Anyway, despite that, I had a blast because I got to spend it with family, at my brother's house. Love was definitely in the air! Check out my pix:



I woke up with this!!! It's from my younger brother, Kab! It's already brown and withered because I just took this photo and obviously, it's been days since Valentine's.. Ü

 



My afternoon Valentine walk with my darling niece, Isla. I was teary-eyed when she picked up a pink flower from the ground, gave it to me and said "Happy VALENTIMES day, Auntie Nangnang.." My heart melted.. I'm so gonna miss her when she leaves.. She's just the sweetest!

Brian and I spent our 5th monthsary at Kab's house (my youngest brother Mac and cousin Titi was there too!) where I cooked Pancit Canton and indulged in some not-so-heavy drinking.

That awesome weekend resulted to my being at the hospital. But, who cares? My love day was spent with some of  the people I truly love and that's all that matters. I miss my Papa though.. :(

Thank you guys for sticking with me! I hope you get all your hearts' desires!!! Here's a big HUG from me to you all! xxx 

Destiny (What Is?)

What exactly is destiny?

I have always believed that no one can control destiny. You know, like you just do what you've always been doing, then something happens - that's destiny!

or is it???? 

I watched My Sassy Girl (American Version) last weekend and it got me into thinking. In that movie, the old man said that molding destiny itself is destiny. Is it? Do we always need to do something for something? Isn't it that if it's meant for you, it's meant for you?

Thoughts? Go comment! xxx

Here's hoping this is my destiny right here: ♥♥♥

 

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

HAPPY HEART

so I looked for love songs

to somehow explain how I feel

sure there are nice, great lines
but they're not perfect so here's mine

it's funny actually..
coz first of all I'm already 30!
and I have been in more-than-a-few relationships
now it's different, I am actually happy!

when you're away, I have just my pillow beside me
I smile at it but it wouldn't smile back
and I would miss you even more
coz it doesn't have eyes, so warm, like yours

it sounds delusional, I know!
I guess that's my way to cope
coz I miss, oh how I miss you
cliché, but when you're not around my love, I am blue

and when you're with me I'm all giddy and happy
when I'm wrapped in your arms, I feel free
and calm and loved and serene and at peace
everything's falling into place, everything's easy..

thank you for hugging me back when I hug you
for rubbing my feet against yours when they're cold
and for warning me whenever you fart
All these, from my happy heart...

Happy Birthday Bri! You're the best! I LOVE YOU! ♥

Story Of My Hair

Hey guys! Did curling irons exist 5 years ago? I don't know, but I just bought one and it's amazing! Before, it would take 8 hours to curl my hair. Now, 15 mins and I'm all set! I don't even need to put on hairspray! TECHNOLOGY HAPPENED, thank goodness!

*you can click on pic for larger view*

I haven't forgotten you guys (of course not)! I don't know what to write these past few days. I don't have outfit pics. I have been busy with life. Plus, the boyfriend was here the whole week last week so you can just imagine me all giddy and happy! Hahaha!

Hopefully next week, my life will be in its normal order.
Hopefully, I'll have outfit pics.
Hopefully, I'll have idea puke.

And then you'll be be sick of me - I hope not!

PS: Below are pictures of my natural hair. I'd like to think it's like Carrie Bradshaw's but that'd be like shooting the moon! Hahaha! I've always had my hair rebonded/straightened eversince I could remember and the reason why I do is straight hair's easier to manage. Curly hair means wax, anti-frizz serum, leave-on conditioner, etc. - and that's way too hassle for lazy me. Ü

brace-face - spell AWKWARD!



with my girlfriends - my "roman era" look - was so pale!

Take care you guys! xxx

Something Calm.. ♥♥♥

Hello guys! You know how we always talk about the person who makes us laugh/smile/giddy/giggly - and everything else that would somehow transpire to that silly look on our faces? That person who brings butterflies in our tummies? I'm just thinking, how about that person who makes us feel relaxed, and calm, and just our plain old selves - no hassle, no fuss? Doesn't he/she deserve to be talked about too??? I'm just saying.. ♥♥♥

*not my photo*

Have a good one! xxx

Love Or Fab?

In the spirit of being true, I am going to write about love. Which absolutely doesn't make sense, I know! Ha-ha!

I have been single for almost 5 months now and yes, I can say that I am loving it. I mean, I've totally forgotten how vast the opportunities and choices a single woman has! No wonder I stayed single for 4 years after breaking up with my exboyfriend before my most recent! I am having the time of my life! Dang! But with recent developments in the love department of my life (geeeez..), I am torn: Love or Fab?

Should I choose to stay single and live fabulously free (which seem to be the more suitable lifestyle for me)? Or should I risk it all again with someone, only to find out that it's just going to be another love gone awry? Eeeeekkk!

For a woman who's tired of break ups (after having more than 5 of them - let's not just go to specifics here.. Hahaha!), how would I know if someone is "THE ONE"?

Am I even ever destined to have someone to be with for the rest of my life?

I've recently broken up with a non-boyfriend, if you know what I mean. And I'm gonna lay out my heart here - I MISS HIM. I care about him so much, I had to protect him from getting hurt. I know I am not yet ready to be in a relationship again so I had to say goodbye.

Or was he just the wrong person?

So many questions, so little me. Oh well.. I guess life is full of questions. And sometimes you have to wait a lifetime for the answers. I just hope mine won't take that long.. Ü

Godspeed! xxx

My 30th Birthday Pictures

I would like to share with you guys pics from my recent 30th birthday! I celebrated it a lot of times and the conclusion was last Saturday's disco where I danced like there's no tomorrow, my bones are still aching! Whew!

Thirty years on earth is something. I am excited for the future! I can't wait to be 40! Enjoy! xxx

AUGUST 10, 2013

my brother, Kab, treated me to lunch on my birthday! Thanks Kab!!!

This was at Crab King, a Singaporean style restaurant. I told the waiters that it's my birthday and voila, special treatment! Or maybe they're really just nice.. Ü.. Anyway, this is a huge, HUGE crab and it's delish but pricey.

On the night of my birthday, I treated myself to my first love: ROCK N ROLL!!! My friends Vanessa Rhea Labesig and Douey Joy Cagud went to the Tanduay T5 Party. It's in an open field and there was a lot of people. I came to see my favorites Wolfgang and Rico Blanco! I had a blast! Remember Woodstuck? Yup, it felt like it!

Rock N Roll means oily, make-up free face! hahahaha!

AUGUST 11, 2013

I went to see my family in Cagayan de Oro city the next day. This is my birthday cake! It's from Red Ribbon. This is huge and it's cheap at Php 650. We just bought flowerettes. Oh and btw, I was the one who put the candles that's why it's crooked. Decorating isn't my niche.

and the obligatory cake pose! hahahaha! my ate (elder sister)  had dinner catered! thanks te! This is the pic I uploaded on WIWT.

my cousin Hazel, my aunts Jean and Teresa, and my uncle Rey

my cousins dj and damdam - they've grown!!!

This moment right here is priceless. These are my siblings.. I don't know what to do without them..

AUGUST 12, 2013

and the queen of my heart, my mother! I had fun taking pics of her while we're in the hotel. She's the strongest person I know.

 

This is at Seda Hotel. There's triple red alert but it didn't stop us from having fun! My family is the best! Of course we miss our Papa, but I know he's just right there with us, having fun as well! Ü

 

August 17, 2013

And the disco at MO2! It was a bomb! I had to take my shoes off! Actually, I didn't really dance. I was jumping and jogging and shouting - all at the same time! hahahaha! Van gave me my tiara - it was so pretty! It suited douey more but it was mine so I wore it!

Again, THANK YOU!!! It was my best birthday, more than anything because I was with my family! My family rocks! And just like the cliche, I must have done someone right to deserve them.. Godpseed! xxx

I Have You

So I was reminded that I actually used to write poems. I haven't since this poem below. The poet in me has gone awry. And I wasn't even great! Ha-ha!
Written: September 21, 2007 - 12:02 pm

My heater's now working, my closet door's closed
The ceiling dust's gone and you fixed my windows
I look at the floor, it is shiny
I see beautiful things, now that you're here with me

Those "hi's and hellos" I used to ignore
I smile at them  since you walked to my door
And that rug that's hanging on my terrace
It has a little red flower embroidery, I just notice

My jeans are there, neatly pressed
That shoes i just bought, matches my dress
I turn around I see my colorful belts
Then I look at the mirror, I see my beautiful self

And in my messy bed, there you lie in silence
With my colorful pillows and blanket
All things are bright and beautiful, you see
 But you're the most beautiful for me.. 

Post Break-Up Day 4

I slept at 6am.
I woke up at 3pm.
I braved myself to face the day alone, see how much I can handle.

I ate.
I watched House, MD.
I didn't have internet connection.
I didn't talk to anyone.
I. DID. NOT. CRY.

I'm excited for tomorrow.

I AM OK.  Ü

Post Break-Up Day 3

I woke up at around 12 NN, which is great. Still, there were thoughts of him. Still, my heart beat fast. But I didn't cry. I smiled, turned on the lights, and watched House, MD. I knew it's going to be a better day.

At 3 pm I texted Therese. I was looking forward to being with someone but she had exams. I cried again. But not a lot this time because I texted Jong (my close friend from college) and he agreed to have coffee with me.

The place we went to is super quaint. Here's a pic:

Jong and I talked until about 8pm. I went to their apartment. I ate "binignit". I told Jong everything. He said I did the right thing. I felt good. We have the same opinion on how relationships should be. Maybe because we're both leos. Ha-ha!

The Ex messaged, asked how I was doing, offered friendship. I'm happy he wants us to be friends, really. But if he's doing it just to make me feel better after the break-up, (or worse, make himself feel better) then, no thanks. He doesn't need to do it. I will be ok, maybe not very soon, but for sure I will be ok.

I've always wondered why I only cry when I'm alone and not when I tell my friends what happened. I kind of imagined myself being in a cafe, crying on my friend's shoulder or pulling tissue after tissue because my tears won't stop, but it didn't happen. I just couldn't cry when I tell my friends how I feel. I got the answer from my TL, Borgy. He told me something that I couldn't forget.

He said, it's because I knew that this was going to happen and that I have accepted it and that I don't hope that my ex and I will get back together.
It's true.
He also said that I got tired  because I love myself more than I love my Ex-bf. I have self respect and I wouldn't want to be taken for granted.
It's true.
Lastly, he also told me that actually, I'm not hurt. I am just lonely because I'm used to not being "alone".
It is probably true.

Here's what I wore today:

Post Break-Up - Day 2

I went home from work at around the same time - 4:30 am. I slept. I woke up with thoughts of him. My heart beat so fast it almost felt like the blood's coming out. I cried.

From around 9 am, when I woke up, until around 3pm, that's been my day's cycle, I cried, and I cried, and I cried. I didn't get out of bed. I didn't turn the lights on. I didn't eat. I didn't watch TV. The plan was to start cleaning my room, do some laundry, plan outfits. But no, it didn't happen. I was wallowing still. I was in pain. Maybe tomorrow.

I chatted with Karryl on FB. She's one of my closest friends on earth and her relationship also just ended. We have the same reason. We planned our weekend getaway. We're going to do more wallowing somewhere silent, cool, and with water. We decided we'll go to Olango Island. I got excited and forgot about my broken heart for a little while.

I also chatted with my good friend Era on FB. Her family's one of the best I know. I miss her.
My bud from College, Rito Enopia, died. I was sad. He's a great guy - one of them few. I swear I can still hear his voice! Again, learning that life is really so short, I decided to email Baboy. I mean, I know that we're broken up and all and that it's really over but I just want to tell him everything that I feel. The email's like the last of the last goodbye. I told him not to reply anymore because I couldn't get over him if he will. Just like love, hope is pain.

At around 3 pm my landlady called me. I went to her house and we talked. I told her I was in pain. I asked her, will I ever get over this? She said she's sure I will. She also separated ways with her husband of 20+ years. She told me if she can do it, I can too. She advised me to go out often. She let me use her phone to call any of my friends. I called Therese.

Therese and I talked, mostly about her life. It was refreshing, hearing other people's sad story. Lately I've been used to telling mine. Of course, she gave me her POV about my recent break-up. She said that it was the best for both of us - We need time apart. I agree.

I went home at around 7 pm. I had dinner. I went to the office. Here's my outfit.

Baboy wasn't online.

Post Break-up Day 1

I went home from the office at around 4:30 AM. I told my officemates about the break-up. And it all made sense while I was telling them. It's true I was tired. It's true that I can't live one more day of all our relationship crap. It's true that no matter what I did yesterday (reminisce all our good times and more) nothing could ever stop me from "suggesting" the break-up. Everything's just not worthy anymore.

Today is another story. I miss him. I miss messaging him. I miss telling him stories abotu my day. At one point I grabbed my phone and attempted to message him on Viber but I chickened out. He needs time alone. He said he needs to find himself.

There's no going back, we're really broken up. But I was happy when I saw that he hasn't deleted our pics in his FB account. I hope that when he finds himself, he will find me.

I was bored. There's weird silence. My heart was beating fast. I talked to my landlady and to her househelp. It's true, misery loves company.

I am miserable.
But I can't cry.
I know it's the best for us.

I went to light some candles at Carmelites church.
I cried in the jeepney.
I love him.

My outfit:

Unbreak My Heart

..because it's broken..

I'm sad and I will cry later or the next day. I don't know. Can you believe I haven't? But I will be ok. Ako pa? As they say, "it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all". It was worth my time because I learned a lot.

I wish my ex-boyfriend well.

So, thoughts.. Probably God gave us to each other to prepare us for someone else. The relationship made me realize a lot of things, one of them's 'love is not enough'. We loved each other but we don't get each other most of the time, unknowingly causing each other pain. I honestly saw this coming. I'm really disappointed of how wrongly we interpret each other's gestures. Our differences really got in the way so the break-up was really for the best. It just gets tiring after a certain time. Needless to say, I don't believe in "opposites attract" anymore! I realize now that all I need is someone who will really know and understand me, because I am not a bad person.

So, gogogo! On to life!

*I'm accepting "broken-hearted" gifts! CALLING FAMILY AND FRIENDS! Ha-ha!* :((

Here's my outfit today:

Happy Birthday Taylor!

Happy 30th birthday to my dream, my forever love Jordan Taylor Hanson! These could've been our kids.. Ha-ha!

LOVE

After almost 8 months, we're finally together! People, this is my love! I am so happy right now.. If only my father's around to see me this happy..

Hugs & kisses to you all coz im getting a lot right now! Mmmwuah!

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