Thursday, April 4, 2013

Post Break-Up Day 3

I woke up at around 12 NN, which is great. Still, there were thoughts of him. Still, my heart beat fast. But I didn't cry. I smiled, turned on the lights, and watched House, MD. I knew it's going to be a better day.

At 3 pm I texted Therese. I was looking forward to being with someone but she had exams. I cried again. But not a lot this time because I texted Jong (my close friend from college) and he agreed to have coffee with me.

The place we went to is super quaint. Here's a pic:

Jong and I talked until about 8pm. I went to their apartment. I ate "binignit". I told Jong everything. He said I did the right thing. I felt good. We have the same opinion on how relationships should be. Maybe because we're both leos. Ha-ha!

The Ex messaged, asked how I was doing, offered friendship. I'm happy he wants us to be friends, really. But if he's doing it just to make me feel better after the break-up, (or worse, make himself feel better) then, no thanks. He doesn't need to do it. I will be ok, maybe not very soon, but for sure I will be ok.

I've always wondered why I only cry when I'm alone and not when I tell my friends what happened. I kind of imagined myself being in a cafe, crying on my friend's shoulder or pulling tissue after tissue because my tears won't stop, but it didn't happen. I just couldn't cry when I tell my friends how I feel. I got the answer from my TL, Borgy. He told me something that I couldn't forget.

He said, it's because I knew that this was going to happen and that I have accepted it and that I don't hope that my ex and I will get back together.
It's true.
He also said that I got tired  because I love myself more than I love my Ex-bf. I have self respect and I wouldn't want to be taken for granted.
It's true.
Lastly, he also told me that actually, I'm not hurt. I am just lonely because I'm used to not being "alone".
It is probably true.

Here's what I wore today: